What Lies Ahead: An Intern’s Perspective

-Written by Dr. Chetana Rajesh

A casual Sunday conversation 

Highlighted an uncomfortable loss of direction

A crucial juncture requiring a tempered approach 

The wrong decision here could result in reproach.

And then like a break in the clouds,

I’m pulled away from my thoughts,

As the dreaded alarm rings,

Another day of my internship begins. 

Distracted by a hectic schedule, 

That made earlier apprehensions seems minuscule,

When I finally find the time to breathe, 

To these apprehensions my mind once again tends to yield. 

Options and uncertainly cloud the path ahead, 

Constant questions fill my head, 

The dreaded words: “What’s next for you?”

When I didn’t have the faintest clue. 

And yet around me everyone seemed so certain, 

And here I as trying to get through a day at a time as an intern.

With time often being against me, 

It gave a sense of the walls closing in with nowhere to flee.

Honestly, it’s not like the future didn’t cross my mind 

But the pros and cons of each option proved to be too much of a bind, 

All I really wanted was a moment to breathe, 

To contemplate this decision with my mind at ease .

But time is a luxury once can’t often afford, 

It was time to recognize that soon my path too would have to be locked, 

Keeping all apprehensions at bay, 

The decision I made would stay . 

And with this in mind, 

As I closed my eyes at night, 

I wondered ‘how many like me feel this apprehension and I uncertainty ‘ 

Or did everyone else make this decision easily and fearlessly ?